Turns Out I’m a Full on Rebel

Ashley Peterson
2 min readMar 13, 2021

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So, a few days ago I was introduced to Bob Jones University. If you are unaware of them, let me introduce you. They are basically the Christian college version of gulag. As I read through their student handbook I realized how quickly I would be expelled, just by living my typical life. I wouldn’t even have to try.

To begin, my appearance is a serious issue apparently. I was unaware that wearing jeans to class is rebellious behavior, but now I know. Not to mention the occasional, vaguely punk inspired clothing I wear. In their eyes I might as well be trotting around with a t-shirt with the f-bomb scrawled across the front. My short half, pixie cut alone would grant me a pretty hefty fine. Heaven forbid I dye it my favorite redish-purple tone. The scandel of it all!

However, I dress nice quite often, so the real problem wouldn’t be in the clothing, but every other area of my life. Just last night I watched a movie with an over PG rating. My roommates and I have some kpop posters in our bedroom, which means we might as well be worshiping satan himself. I go on websites with secular song lyrics. And sometimes when I’m at home with my family, I drink alcohol. Not to mention all the unchaperoned dates I went on freshman year when I still had a boyfriend. We even cuddled, so I’m practically the whore of Babylon at this point.

The real kicker for me though, is their music policies. I basically spend at least a quarter of my day, if I can, listening to music. It means a lot to me. At good old BJU, they do not allow music with, get this, any influence of pop, rock, jazz, rap, hip hop, or country, even in personal use. So, you know, every genre of music basically. I guess we can all enjoy some nice Mozart. There is not a single song in the days worth of content on my Spotify that would be acceptable. My typical music listening habits alone would rack me up enough write ups to be expelled. If you think none of this sounds like complete insanity well, maybe you’re their idea of a perfect student. Clearly it’s not me.

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